A surprising walking buddy

An old stone fence on a trail that runs along a ridge above our neighborhood.

Although I’ve been an avid walker for many years, Dale likes to run a couple of miles and get it over with quick. In the past, he’d walk only when he needed to catch his breath while running. I could rarely get him to accompany me on a walk – sometimes a hike through the woods, but that was rare.

Somewhere along the line he decided to start walking more. After all these years, it’s like a mini-miracle. We live in a neighborhood with all sorts of trails, although the maps leave something to be desired. As a solo woman walker, I’m careful and follow the advice shared with the two young lads in American Werewolf in London:

“Stay off the moors! Stick to the road.”

Of course, they didn’t stick to the road, and the rest is werewolf history. So far, I’m safe.

But Dale has been exploring. He came home all excited and said he wanted to take me on a hike that starts on an obscure trail near the end of our street. So that’s what we did yesterday. He said the narrow path was steep, and he didn’t get good traction with his running shoes, so he switched to hiking boots.

I wore my regular trail running shoes (even though I don’t run). I also took along some trekking poles to help with balance. They also take pressure off the knees.

The surprise came at the top of the ridge, where there was an old stone fence that seemingly stretched forever. Crusted with moss, we guessed the fence was more than 100 years old. Probably used to keep cattle from wandering off.

It looked like the trail continued down the ridge to connect with another trail I do frequent, but we weren’t sure and didn’t feel like hiking down there only to find ourselves with another uphill trek.

What a surprising walking buddy! I never saw it coming, although I will have to be careful and let it unfold at Dale’s pace. Note to self … this does not mean we start training for the Camino. Still, over the weekend we’re going to check out the maps and see if we can figure out where the trail goes. Or maybe we’ll just go for it.

Sometimes surprises are right around the corner. And just when you think you know a person, they change. Change is good.

Time to retire work clothes?

We’ve talked about this before. Many of you have already dumped your work clothes, but I can’t quite make the leap.

Instead, I inventoried my professional attire, and I’m actually proud of what I put together to wear my last few years on the job. I hated the suity-suity look, but I managed to create a timeless wardrobe true to my personality and appropriate for my mostly business-casual work environment. I focused on seasonless fabrics in solid neutral colors so I could mix and match without buying more clothes than I needed. 

Jackets were the greatest challenge after my mastectomy. Since I didn’t opt for reconstruction and am as flat as a 10-year-old boy, I found that anything with darts was a nonstarter. Dresses were also out. I favored skirts and pants with cropped baseball-style jackets in a variety of good quality fabrics.

It was not easy or cheap. I liked Brooks Brothers. The good news is everything still looks great and fits beautifully. I was like, damn, I did good! In retirement, I find those jackets in white, navy, khaki and black, are easy to wear with jeans and other casual looks.

Here’s what’s left of work attire that’s harder to re-purpose. Everything is tropical weight wool.

  • 1 navy blue skirted suit
  • 1 purplish tailored blazer
  • 1 gray pencil skirt
  • 1 gray skirt with pleats
  • 1 pair black slacks

The next step was to take them to the dry cleaners. I haven’t been near a dry cleaner in years, so I actually had to hunt one down! If I donate or consign the clothes, at least they will be clean.

Here’s what I’m thinking. I only have one suit, which I saved for interviews, trips to Corporate, etc. It never hurts to have a classic dark suit in your closet. The slacks are perfect black pants, and I could see wearing them out and about with a t-shirt, denim jacket and boots. The blazer fits me perfectly, flat chest and all. Perhaps I could wear it with jeans or the black pants for a special occasion.

That leaves the two gray skirts. I love them both, and I felt so good putting them on and checking myself out in the mirror. It has been a long time since I’ve seen me in anything but workout clothes or jammies. Purging dress shoes was one of my first bold acts of retirement, so I Googled pencil skirts with Birkenstocks, and yes, such a thing exists.

Even if I can pull it off, where would I go dressed as such? The colder months would be easier, as I could always go with black tights and some sort of comfy shoe. All that to say I’m still on the fence about the skirts. Maybe I should get rid of them.

What do you think?

All-clear from the dermo

Now that I’m catching up on appointments, I visited the dermatologist for what I call the big naked look-see. I drew his attention to a couple of spots, which he identified as maturity. Everyone’s a comedian.

He said my skin looked great, whatever I’m doing, keep doing. I’m of Eastern European descent, and even after years of sun worshiping with baby oil and Bain de Soleil, I’ve fared quite well.

Still, as a BRCA-positive two-time cancer survivor, I take nothing for granted. I am outdoors a lot, mostly playing golf for more than four hours at a time. One of my golf buddies (one of the pink people) is out for a couple of weeks following the Mohs procedure for cancerous cells on his face.

Even with my darker skin, I have already had my lifetime quota of surgeries, so I take cover. I spray my legs with sunscreen and wear SPF 50 on my face with a large-brimmed hat. I have a UV-blocking umbrella and wear these shoulder wraps under my golf shirts.

While I do swim outdoors, I only swim for 30 minutes two or three times a week, so I don’t worry too much about it. If it got to be an issue, I could wear a UV-blocking rash guard.

All in all, retired life is still good, COVID and all. I do feel like we are at the beginning of the end of the pandemic. Maybe not, but that’s my story, and I’m sticking to it.

18 thoughts on “A surprising walking buddy”

  1. I think you’ll know when it’s time. You still seem attached to them, so perhaps not quite yet. Which is fine- it’s a process.
    It took me a good five years, and even after 10 years I still have my black and navy blue kitten heels. But now I’m seeing kitten heels being styled with dark colored skinny jeans and a white shirt, so perhaps they’ll have a new life.

    Gray pencil skirt with a nice sweater and boots is pretty timeless though, so maybe a new life for them as well.

    1. I like thinking that I’ll know when it’s time. Also, that it’s not all or nothing at all and might be more of a gradual process. Thanks!

  2. Took me about a year to be able to release the work clothes.I loved a lot of those clothes but in retirement we spend most of our time out in nature, on trails, kayaking, swimming. On the patio. I play cards during the day, I go to art group and get paint all over me.. the work clothes sat around. We rarely go out to dinner. Casual lunches on way home from the library is a typical retirement “date,” We do go to local theater . So a few times a year I like to wear a skirt or prettier outfit. I kept most of my black slacks.. none are dry cleanable..all go in the washer. ALL the work shoes are gone! I took what I no longer wear to a local consignment store and got store credit and over time I bought pieces more in line with the casual bo ho look I prefer day to day. I also sold all those Chico’s BELTS I used to love. I like knowing other working women got good bargains from my work wear.. AND it’s “recycling!!”

    PS: LOVE the hiking story!!

    1. It sounds like you’ve done a great job reinventing your wardrobe. I love the idea of a store credit at the consignment shop — I didn’t know they did that. I do love the idea of someone enjoying these clothes today …

  3. From our point of view your regained life sounds quite glamourous, Donna!
    Haircuts, hiking and swimming… we only can dream of. Upcoming week husband gets his first vaccination and I hope to follow soon. In the meanwhile we have a long daily walk in the Park, but it’s not a substitute for our Gym (which is closed now for 6 month).

    Re the work clothes, why not wear those skirts with a button down and Birkenstocks to the Grocery store ? I have 2 silky slip ons in the closet and plan to order a shirt or two from “With Nothing Underneath” (like the Caban Shirt). If I lived in the US it would be “Frank & Eileen” or so.
    Keep those items, even if you don’t wear it often. A good jacket and jeans are a look which never goes out of fashion.

    1. All in all, our regained life is pretty good. As far as I’m concerned, some of the COVID policies are keepers — like reserving a lane at the swimming pool, reserving a table at the winery for a tasting. We still haven’t been to a restaurant, but we’re checking out places with patio dining. I hope you start having more fun very soon!

      I love the idea of the skirt, a button down and Birkies. Those shirts from With Nothing Underneath are GORGEOUS. You’ve given me some great ideas, thank, Barbara!

  4. I am a male. Retired in 2005 at 63. Took all suits, lots of ties, sport coats, to SPCA re-sale store. Kept 1 navy blazer (Brooks Bros.), 1 nice dress shirt, 1 nice tie,(Robert Talbot), 1 pair of Allen-Edmonds dress shoes, 1 pair of nice khaki slacks. Everything was GONE within weeks of retirement.
    Have not worn squat since retirement. Excuse me, I did keep my 30+ year old corduroy sport coat, with patched elbows, (dark khaki), belted around the mid-rif, that I wore to class when I was a university professor and before I became a university administrator. I love it. Parting with it would be parting with my history.
    Have not worn it yet. Excuse me again. Wife says I have worn it to outdoor weddings and funerals over the years. Even when it called for a more formal dresswear. I’m old, so I look senile. I am excused.
    In the summer I am in T-shirts and shorts. Colder weather I am in jeans and sweatshirt. Ahhhh, retirement life is good.

    1. Thank you for your very entertaining comment! Some things like beloved corduroy sport coats are hard to part with. We have a big heavy corduroy couch we’ve been hauling around for more than 40 years. It’s perfect for reading or napping, so it stays.

      You make a good case for getting rid of the clothes. If I haven’t worn them after three years, am I likely to? The only thing that makes me wonder is that I’m sort of itching to wear something nice after a year of lockdown. Basically, I live out of one laundry basket of clothes.

  5. Ah, the old work clothes dilemma. I retired in 2016. I have not ripped the band aid off, but I have continued to downsize as the mood strikes. All work wear is donated to Dress for Success, which helps women prepare to enter the workforce. I have a batch ready to go there, including a fabulous, very expensive trench coat that I found for a song at a charity fundraiser a few years ago. Finally ready to let it go after I found a great Eileen Fisher short sporty raincoat last year. The worst part for me is that my job also called for clothes for evening events, mostly cocktail but occasionally formal. Seriously not a part of my current life, but I would hate to donate my full-length black skirt, only to have a need for one.

    Like you, I keep up with the dermatologist (I got a sunburn in Scotland!) I had a skin issue last summer and had my one and only doctor appointment during the pandemic. My sister had the Mohs surgery, and I’m hoping to prevent that.

    1. I got rid of the evening stuff first. That was never my thing, and never will be. Plus, they didn’t fit after my mastectomy. I had a gorgeous St. John cocktail dress I gave to a co-worker. The gradual “as the mood strikes” approach appeals to me. I’ve looked into Dress for Success and would definitely go that route if I donate the clothes.

  6. Glad Dale “has seen the light.” 🙂

    Always feel great after a walk, the longer the better.
    Happy trails!

    1. Me, too! I just have to make sure I don’t try to turn him into me. I’ve been itching to do a multi-day walking tour for years, and I would love for him to go with me, but we’ll have to see.

  7. A year later I still have most of my work wardrobe. Although it is not as formal as most peoples’ because I worked for an agricultural company where denim was quite often the power suit worn to work and meetings. This pandemic has meant I don’t even know what true retirement is going to look like for me, just yet. Outside of self-isolating, I mean.
    I had a basal cell cancer cut out of my cheek when I was only 30. I used to go for regular skin checkups but 31 years later, these visits have dropped off. My old dermatologist called my spots “barnacles of old age”…I’ve gone to get de-barnacled every few years and cheekily asked for the volume discount. These…ahem…”polishings” are considered cosmetic and thus have to be paid out of pocket under Canadian healthcare. I think I need to find a new skin person now that I’ve moved.

    Deb

    1. I love a company where denim is a power suit. And in many ways, retirement is self-isolating, so you’re actually on track.

      Please do keep up with the dermatologist. We want to enjoy this retired life as long as possible!

  8. I might be the long-hauler here. I’m 7 years out and still have more than a handful of work clothes. I keep telling myself I’ll wear the jackets with jeans (I don’t) or the dress pants when we go out (I don’t there, either!), or cute low heeled shoes with jeans (nope again). Now with our move to Florida and the even more casual style there (women have their dress-up flip flops), I’m sure even more will be finding their way to the donate pile. I did however wear my skirts… they look great with tights and flats. It became my going-out outfit, even for wine with friends. Not sure how much that will work in Florida though.

    1. This has been interesting. I’m surprised how many of us have kept some of the clothes we don’t wear. I’m inclined to keep the jackets, since flat-chested fashion is hard to come by, and I know these fit. I’m less likely to wear the skirts, but I’m going to see what they look like with maybe a t-shirt and sneakers or something like that. If I don’t like it, they are out of here.

      Good luck with your move!

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