I mentioned a little while ago my 50th high school reunion committee found me, and I’ve been connecting with a handful of those I used to hang out with. It’s part of a larger conspiracy to get me to actually attend the reunion, which is in September, but the upside is I’ve had some great conversations with people I haven’t heard from in many, many years.
Last week I had lunch with one of my old friends who lives not all that far away. We met in the middle – about an hour’s drive for each of us – and it was so much fun I’ve actually been considering the reunion.
We think we met in the 8th grade. And then went to the same high school. We mostly had the same circle of friends throughout high school, although she was under the mistaken impression I was included because I was one of the smart ones. There must have been another reason, although I was pretty good at English.
In fact, she couldn’t wait to tell me her favorite memory. She was good at math but struggled with English. She said I taught her how to write a five-paragraph essay and even drew a diagram, and it stuck with her through high school and college.
I vaguely remember having a little formula for writing essays, and once she prompted me, I could sort of recall the details. I know I did write a few essays in exchange for cash, but I forgot to ask her if I charged her! She was so pleased to hear I capitalized on my strengths and fashioned a great career in corporate communications.
As for high school, my downfall was geometry and then biology, because I wouldn’t dissect a frog. She said she didn’t either. I got bumped from the college prep program partly because of that, but also because I did so poorly on the SATs.
She made the cut in spite of the frog situation and went on to college after high school graduation like all my other friends. But she said she got married while in college and started having babies, so it took her a little longer than some. I joined the Army and went to college later on the G.I. Bill.
We went to school with a bunch of rich kids. My friend’s parents were educated but of modest means, I think, and she remembered my family life was messed up, and we didn’t have much money. Both of us were kind of shocked we turned out pretty great all things considered.
I’m still socially awkward and am reluctant to attend the reunion, but I was surprised how special it was to spend an afternoon with someone who knew me before I was fully formed. And that all this time has passed, yet I found myself liking her more than I’ve liked anyone in a long time.
Seriously, she was so kind and charming and interesting, and I was beating myself up for losing touch in the first place.
I remember a little poem or maybe it was a song I learned as a child.
Make new friends
But keep the old
One is silver
The other is gold
I enjoyed hearing about your experience with old high school friends. Bravo to you for taking the step to actually meet them for a lunch, not always easy to do for introverts and/or shy ones. You were so fortunate to find out that you actually enjoyed them as grown up people, and had interesting conversation. I have a couple of high school friends that I don’t see often. Sadly, we do not share similar view on politics, world view, or common interests. They are my “friends from the past”. It is still fun to reminisce about our high school days 55 years ago. I stay loyal to the thread that connects us to our past.
I like what you said about the thread that connects us to our past. There’s something to that. It was nice to share similar politics, but we had both encountered one of our other friends who went in the opposite direction. It’s a tough hurdle to overcome.
Were you a Girl Scout? We sang that song in Girl Scouts as a round. It’s good to know you can connect with people without having to attend the reunion. Prior to our 40th reunion, I ended up talking with some women that I grew up with, kindergarten through high school, but hadn’t seen or heard from in 40 years. I’ve maintained a friendship for a decade now with them, although we live in three different states. We had our own mini 50th reunion two years ago where we hung out at the beach, toured our old neighborhood and had an excellent time together. Our Covid postponed 50th is happening this month, and none of us are going. Instead, we’re getting together for a 70th birthday party and two days of fun and food. I much prefer that to big groups of people I don’t really remember.
I was not a Girl Scout, but I must have hung out with girls who were. I probably won’t go to the reunion. But I might suggest an outing like you’ve described. That would be fun.