I guess I will just come out and say it. On Monday, Dale fell off a ladder getting down Christmas stuff out in the garage. I was not home when it happened. He crawled inside and waited for me. For two hours, maybe longer.
When I arrived, he was lying on a small carpeted area near the entryway. I asked what happened and if I could help him up, but he said he didn’t think he could get up. I said you know I’m going to have to call 911, right?
So, that’s what I did. They came quickly, moved him to a stretcher, put him in the ambulance and away he went to the hospital. The rescue guys told me to go to the ER and tell them my husband was transferred there by ambulance, and they would tell me where to go.
We spent a few hours in the ER. The doctor said it was good news, bad news. He did not break a hip, but he broke his pelvis. He fell off the bottom rung and went straight down onto his butt, so there were no head injuries or any other problems.
The doctor said sometimes people walk out of there the same night. That would not be the case for Dale. He was in a little pain just lying down, but he could not bear putting any weight on it at all.
He was admitted to the hospital Monday night. He’s in good spirits, but it’s very hard for him to stand up or walk. A physical therapist and an occupational therapist have been working with him, and they said he’s doing better than most, that it’s just a matter of time.
Today they will transfer him to a skilled nursing facility for additional rehab. He will be there until he can come home. Maybe a week, maybe two weeks, maybe more. We just don’t know. I do know he can’t come home at this point.
We live in a two-story house, and our bedroom is upstairs. I’m waiting until he gets to the new place to find out what he is going to need. My general plan is to get some kind of a bed and put it in what used to be a downstairs bedroom. We converted it to a walk-in pantry, but there’s room for a bed. There’s also a small bathroom right next to it with a walk-in shower, grab bars, etc.
I guess that’s it. It’s all very stressful, but what can you do? I did blow up on my sister, who isn’t a doctor but plays one on the Internet. I apologized immediately and that night decided I need to bring my best self to this party. Stay calm, stay strong.
As you know, I had cancer twice. The first involved three surgeries, six months of chemo and lots of recovery time. Dale was there for me for both cancers, but that first one was particularly tough. He was my rock, and I need to be his.
The neighbors have been fantastic, and that’s a big help. The kitty misses his daddy, although he never budged from his upstairs nap to see what was going on when his main man was in the fetal position downstairs. Just saying. A dog might have been there for him.
Anyway, that’s all I got. Stay off ladders!
Never going on a ladder again, ever. Until next time. Time for nurse Donna to shine.
Seriously, when you hear the next chapter, you will not go on that ladder again. Even if I have to get on a stepping stool, the new rule is two people have to be there for it.
Morning
So sorry about Dale! Ladders are not are friends as we age!
Hopefully he recovers fully in a short amount of time!
I stay off ladders and stools and standing on chairs not worth falling!
Good luck u both are in my thoughts!
Even stepping stools scare me now. Thanks for your warm wishes.
Omg! So sorry to hear about this. We know this story is all too common as we have had several friends who have experienced similar outcomes with stairs. We send our get well wishes to Dale, and to you as you navigate the plans ahead. Stay strong and keep calm as you shine as his rock this time. Our thoughts are with you.
Thank you!
Yikes – sorry to hear that. Hopefully Dale will recover well. I’m never comfortable on ladders (or heights in general).
Me, neither! I have a plan to get everything out of high places.
Dear Donna,
I am so so sorry to hear about Dale’s accident. I suppose it could be worse.
I showed my husband your post and he was visibly shaken. He said he will stay off the ladder now.
You are a strong and motivated person and I have no doubt that you will be the rock for Dale.
Please do take care of yourself too. Just like on the plane, you’ll have to put the oxygen mask on first before you can help others.
You are so right about the oxygen mask. I’m having to force myself to eat, and that doesn’t happen very often!
Oh no! I’m so sorry that happened… but not surprised. Almost ten years ago I fell off a low rung of a ladder onto a cement patio and broke a hip bone that required a couple of pins to hold things together. I’m perfectly fine now but it took a while. Thank goodness for my husband. Being the injured one is hard but being the caregiver is hard too. Lots of deep breaths.
He and I have both been through some serious pain before, so we know it will get better. But damn.
A fall is always unexpected — and, off the first rung! I’ve had a couple of falls in the past year and know how shocked the body feels, even if no bones are broken. I hope your husband heals quickly and gets good care.
I know you’ll be strong for him.
Thank you for your note. I really appreciate all the kind words.
Hugs to you and Dale! That’s a lot to go through and I’m hoping he doesn’t feel too bad.
Feeling those hugs right now. Thank you. He feels pretty good when he’s still — it’s just movement that is so brutal.
Hi Donna, I’m glad you were there for Dale and got him to the ER. Your love and support will help him during his recovery. The both of you will figure this rough patch out. Hugs to you both.
Thank you. I’m so appreciative of our little community here. I haven’t been much of a caregiver, but I am rising to the occasion.
Oh, no! I’m so sorry, sending healing vibes to Dale and a hug to you.
Summer before last I tripped going down our flagstone steps in our 3-tiered back yard and hit my hip (the one with an artificial hip), hard, on the edge of one of the flagstone steps. Hip did fine but I did fracture my pelvis in 3 places, fortunately all “closed” or “minimally displaced” fractures. It’s a waiting game mostly as the pelvis heals. I guess that I was fortunate in that my fractures were minimal and that I already had a small indoor rollator from hip replacement days (far better than a walker in my opinion) plus my big outdoor all terrain Veloped Rollator for my daily dog nature walks. Those helped me get around with less pain, not that I was able to do a lot of walking those initial weeks but I was advised to walk with support as much as tolerable, that it would help the healing. I also bought a coccyx pillow, recommended by my ortho doc, to put in my ekornes chair in the den where I spend most of my sitting time. (It’s very portable though.) I got it on Amazon (can be purchased from other sites too) and I still use it since I have a wonky spine and it helps that also. The brand is called Everlasting Comfort memory foam pillow and is around $49. Still going strong after a year and a half of daily use.
It sounds however, that your husband’s fracture(s) are far worse than mine were. My indoor rollator is called the Stander (Trust) Let’s Go Rollator and has a handy tray on the basket that you can roll right up to where you’re sitting making it easy to use an ipad or eat a meal from or transport stuff and even take into places where you have to walk if you still need support and you don’t look like a dork because it’s very streamlined and modern, minimalist. I use when we go into a big box stores with my husband who always wants to man the cart so I don’t have a cart for support. I can walk normal when my spine is supported, but I digress. It’s pricy for a rollator at around $350 but like my Veloped which cost me $1600 four years ago, worth every penny for exceptional utility and a cool style.
I realize that Dale may not want or need a rollator; they will likely assign him a walker to take home, but that pillow may help a lot. Ask his doctor and/or PT about it. I use a small rectangular travel pillow that has chopped up foam in it as additional back support in my chair. I’ve tried many things but that simple pillow that is kind of squishy but is still supportive is what’s worked best for me.
I’m definitely not trying to give advice, just mentioning what worked well for me with pelvis fractures. It did take me over 8 weeks to fully heal (8-12 weeks is the norm) but I laid down “good bone” per the orthopedic surgeon assigned to me and at 10 weeks was able to get in to my fave PT and upon testing me he proclaimed that my hip was fine, my pelvis was fine, but my back (he made a face) and eventually told me that we can no longer make it better, we can only keep it from getting worse so I work on keeping it from getting worse.
All my best to Dale and to you. The aging process holds many booby traps. Ladders are problematical at this stage of life…perhaps at any stage of life but particularly when we are older. When I watch football and see the spills and hits those guys take and watch them roll and bounce back up, I am in awe. Granted they have padding, are physical specimens and such. A medical doctor I follow recently posted a tongue in cheek essay on the dangers he sends his patients out to when recommending exercise and he had a link to an inflatable vest for elders or, anyone I guess, that if you fall, inflates several cushions around your body and head to protect you for the princely sum of $999. You kind of laugh but perhaps in some situations, it’s probably a good idea.
And we have since, installed a handrail alongside those steps.
This is very interesting and very helpful. I’m ordering the pillow today. We also have Ekornes chairs! He said sitting up in the recliner at the hospital was hard on his butt, and I showed him the picture of the pillow, and he said yes! The rollater info is useful. I will ask about that at the rehab place.
His fractures are actually the good kind — what they call nondisplaced. Eight weeks sounds like a long time, but really, it isn’t. I think he will be much better after another week. It’s this initial period that is so painful and difficult.
Thank you.
So sorry to hear this. Wishing him a full recovery and you patience.
Thanks. Hope your world is getting better, too!
So sorry this has happened to Dale. Wishing him a full and speedy recovery.
It does suck, but all the good wishes help. They really do.
Healing wishes to Dale. Also a reminder to you, as caretaker/next of kin/one riding shotgun, to guard your own health as you both get through this. It can take a sneaky toll. When I was in the barrel with cancer, my nurse, my case manager, and his mother all warned my husband that however brave and devoted his efforts (and they were), something might come out later. Sure enough he got shingles the year after I finished treatment, and I`m sure I know why. So take care of yourself. And accept all offers of help, even or especially from sisters.
Yeah, ladders scare me. Every time I have used one in the past few years I think, “This is absolutely the last time.” I need to mean it, and this story might help me to commit.
Yes, I know I need to take care of myself. It’s more work than I imagined. Our neighbors have offered help, and I am accepting it with no hesitation. Both sisters play doctors on TV, and they think I’m clueless, but I am learning to navigate that, and mine actually did have some good advice for me yesterday. So, yes, to your point about sisters.
You will definitely stay off the ladders when I share the next chapter of this journey. Skilled nursing facility. Enough said for now. At least have a two-person rule. Never get up on a ladder or even a stepping stool without someone else there.
How awful! I’m so sorry this happened, especially right before Christmas. Definitely no ladders without someone else there. I hope they’re able to control the pain. And do not stand on chairs. Sometimes I think bubble wrap for humans, or at least my husband, would be a good idea. You’ll never forget Christmas 2025.
You are so right. I will never forget Christmas 2025. I don’t like Christmas, anyway. Human bubble wrap — great idea!
I was so sorry to read about your husband’s fall. I hope he recovers quickly. The two-person ladder rule will be implemented in my house from here on.
Thank you so much. Yes, the two person rule is our future. He’s doing better but they say pelvic fractures are incredibly painful. He would attest to that. The pain meds are helpful.
Oh my!!! That is awful. I hope things improve. Ladders are a no-no here. My daughter does get on the roof, but I always ask that I’m here, just in case. She’s 40, so still youngish. It’s always something, isn’t it? Take care and healing thoughts for Dale.
Thank you so much, Chris. I know this was a hard Christmas for you, too. I wish you all the best for 2026.